Good morning my stylish readers,
We are learning how to fix surface features. Surface are little bits in your writing. We had to fix are writing like repeating words and punctuation. We fix the full stops and the capitals. Surface features meant that they mean punctuation and repeat words.
We go to the room 9 site then we go to writing to find out where is the meaning of the Surface features. Why do we do Surface features and language features? Because we can get better at using them in a stories. We need to used surface features for people to read. We also had fix are writing if we had to much writing.
We had to go to the Room 9 site our teacher Miss T had made a link for our writing to make a copy of this document and had to read what we had to do for the document. We had to read it once then we had to fix the sentences that didn't make sense. We would put capital letters for the place where we put are full stops and made them better.
To find the end of a sentence when it had a new idea. Then when we were re reading we highlighted all the repeating words. We had to highlight the words to make sure we had to make sure the repeated words were highlighted.
The other day we went through the document together help each other if we were stuck on it. Miss T thought how about we chose some people to act out as the characters in this story. Rinaz, Xavier, Sean, were chosen to act out as the people Rinaz was the narrator, Xavier was the killer in the story and Sean was the little boy in the story.
These is not my story another person had written it but it had no surface features. So we had fix the sentences that didn't make sense.
Here is a example for you guys to work out! thissentsaChulymakessen Zbuttisrellyhrd to reed?
Here is the real version and my version
Here is the real version of the writing here is my change of the story. Miss T first had us to make a copy of this version then make it into some surface features.
He kept absolutely still as the footsteps got louder he tried not to suffocate as he laid under the bed he was wondering what had happened to his brother and his family. The man with the knife in his hand stormed around the house. Mums had boyfriends before but we had not thought that they would ever find us maybe he was one of them looking for revenge but why would he come. mum would just move and how did he find us we live on the other side of the planet from where all of mums boyfriends were so how could he find us he might have put a tracker on mum when he last saw her or on one of the devises ‘Hello where are you I know your here you're going to tell me where you're mother is or you shall join your father... in the skies so which will it be death or freedom you have 10 seconds chose wisely’.
Bradon kept absolutely still as the footsteps got louder. He tried not to be suffocate as he laid under the bed. Brandon was wondering what had happened to his brother and his family. The man name was Liam he had a knife in his hand stormed around the house.
Mums has had boyfriends before but we had not thought that they would ever find us maybe he was one of them looking for revenge but why would he come. Mum would just move. How did he find us? We live on the other side of the planet from where all of mums boyfriends were. How could he find us? He might have put a tracker on mum when he last saw her or on one of her devise
‘Hello, where are you? I know your’re here. You're going to tell me where you're mother is or you shall join your father... in the skies. So which will it be, death or freedom! You have ten seconds choose wisely’.
Thank you for reading my blog post please comment and have a wonderful day my readers. I hope you learn how to change your writing into surface features. If you want to figure out the example write in the comment about what you think it is.
Hello Jade.
ReplyDeleteI like that you gave the 'he' a name.I think it makes the story more interesting to read.
Just remember that when someone is talking we need to use speech marks.